Perks Magazine

An exploration of sex, sexuality and little bits of life

The Perky Jouney

The Perky journey began back in 2010 with a little blog called Rhonda Perky’s Bits.

In my early 30s, married and divorced, from horny to frigid and back again, I began to delve into my experiences with friendship, love, lust, and everything in between.

My blog was a place to document my reflections and shifting perspectives on social norms such as monogamy and kink, and my experiences navigating the interpersonal.

A few years on, having enrolled to study sexology and sexual health, I expanded the blog to encompass feature articles, essays, and observations, and launched Perks Magazine.

I hope my journey inspires you to reflect and explore.

With love, Rhonda xx

Latest posts

It’s complicated

A letter to you, Dad. Because it’s complicated.

Three Wishes

If I had three wishes…

How to Have Free Fetish Phone Calls Online

Fetish phone calls are a safe, anonymous way for individuals to explore their fantasies and desires. But how do you have a successful fetish phone call?

Erotic Pop Art

From D-Rex vs Triceracocks to Mr. Bearbottom, Christopher Adam Gray shares his whimsical exploration of sex positive concepts and figurative art with Perks Magazine.

Not my circus, not my monkeys

Rhonda reflects on the many ways she has taken on responsibility that never belonged to her.

I’m not okay with my bf’s past and sexual interests – should I leave him?

Rhonda answers the question: ‘I’m not okay with my bf’s past and sexual interests – should I leave him?’

My sex life

Rhonda reflects on the role sex plays in life (or doesn’t) and the struggles many women face (re)connecting with their sex life.

On consent: pushing past ‘no’ isn’t a victory

Rhonda explores the nuances of consent and what happens when we are socialised to defer to the needs of others or to push past no.

Why I chose not to have children

Rhonda explores the grief around her choice not to have children, from societal pressures, childhood trauma, and the state of the world today.

The pitfalls of making friends as a grownup

Rhonda faces some of the pitfalls of making friends as an adult and what can happen when one friend needs the company of the other more.

Under the covers…

Relation-ships
Kink
Single
Life
Sex
Your Stories
Sexuality
Perky Leigh
Porn
Ask Rhonda
Editorial
Perky’s Bits
Reviews

69 ways to balance cats on your breasts

Carl Skase offers you the listicle to end all listicles: 69 ways to balance cats on your breasts. Or, a tribute to what the internet does best!

Stop Being a White Knight

Or, why you shouldn’t try to save the people you want to f*ck

‘…to the exclusion of all others’

What monogamy really asks of our long-term partners and ourselves.

Choke Me, Spit On Me, I’m a Feminist — Part Two

Clarissa-Jan Lim shares the story of a self-proclaimed feminist BDSM couple Ian Locklear and Nicole Lavoie and the ways they reconcile their feminist views with their D/s lifestyle…

Passionfruit: A sex shop with a difference

Think if you’ve seen one sex shop you’ve seen them all? Look again. Michelle Temminghoff talks about what makes Passionfruit The Sensuality Shop in Melbourne, Australia, more than just an adult store.

Worst Places to Have Sex

Carl Skase contemplates some of the worst places you can have sex.

Review: Sex with Shakespeare

We review Jillian Keenan’s memoir on Shakespeare, love, and spanking: a story not just for kinksters and fetishists, but for everyone.

Misguided protectiveness, slut-shaming or internalised paternalism?

Rhonda Perky examines how everyday paternalism shifts accountability, and asks: ‘What makes us uncomfortable? Whose behaviour is really the problem? Where does the accountability lie?’

Erotic Pop Art

From D-Rex vs Triceracocks to Mr. Bearbottom, Christopher Adam Gray shares his whimsical exploration of sex positive concepts and figurative art with Perks Magazine.

Rope Sensei: your one-stop rope shop

Want to explore the pleasures of playing with rope? Rope Sensei has got your back.

Projecting Rejection

The first in a series of posts where Rhonda explores self-image, projection, and the ego-defences we use to preserve our sense of self.

‘Nobody buys flowers for the porn-pile girl’

Rhonda Perky goes under the covers to discover what it means to be a Modern Slut.

The pitfalls of making friends as a grownup

Rhonda faces some of the pitfalls of making friends as an adult and what can happen when one friend needs the company of the other more.

Not my circus, not my monkeys

Rhonda reflects on the many ways she has taken on responsibility that never belonged to her.

The friendship destroyer

Rhonda learns a lesson in why some friendships are best left behind.

I am more than my appearance

I can’t change the way we objectify and value physical appearance; I can only change the way I see myself. I am more than my appearance, more than my achievements, and I don’t have to be seen to have value.

Conflicting desires: when arousal is disturbing

Objectifying images may be less comfortable and more confronting to watch, but they can evoke a more direct physical response. But what if there is an emotional cost of continually engaging in this kind of ‘disturbing arousal’?

Memory — The Self as an Unreliable Narrator

In Part Two of this exploration of self-image, projection, and the ego-defences, Rhonda explores the unreliability of memory.

Unravelling jealousy

Rhonda reveals her struggle with jealousy and what it means to hold on by letting go.

My sex life

Rhonda reflects on the role sex plays in life (or doesn’t) and the struggles many women face (re)connecting with their sex life.

Safe Sex is Sexy

Porn performer and escort Madison Missina talks to Perks about the Safe Sex is Sexy social awareness campaign.

What I learned from online dating

Online dating taught me less about love and lust and more about confronting my fears. I didn’t always have a good time, but I collected an array of new experiences, and ultimately skills that have helped me learn and grow socially and professionally.

What does a word weigh?

‘Rape’? Rhonda Perky reflects on the weight of words in how we conceptualise our experiences.

My hate-hate relationship with sex toys

Rhonda reflects on her troubled relationship with sex toys.

Mentioning the unmentionable

What’s with all the stigma around herpes anyway?

The Creepy Line: Do Not Cross

Rhonda explores why it’s socially acceptable for women to flirt and compliment, but not straight men.

Perky Commandments

Rhonda’s commandments for love, lust and life.

A Unicorn’s Survival Guide

Rhonda reflects on surviving as a unicorn in the Swinger’s Scene.

Why I am a Masochist

‘How I became aware of my masochism.’ Erotic novelist David (Pinke Grapefruit) explores what being a masochist means to him.

How do I introduce a kink to my partner?

Rhonda helps a kinky lover introduce a new kink to their repertoire.

My girlfriend agreed to an open relationship… until I wanted to act on it

Rhonda Perky answers your question: My girlfriend agreed to an open relationship… until I wanted to act on it. What should I do?

How can I get past my performance anxiety?

Rhonda answers your question on how to overcome performance anxiety during sex.

How can a horny mistress get her fix without needing to fix her back?

Rhonda helps Mistress Heather get her fix without needing to fix her back.

I’m in love with someone in an open relationship, what should I do?

Is it worth pursuing love when your lover is in an open relationship with someone else?

I am a virgin, how can I satisfy my experienced man?

Rhonda gets a little ranty answering your question: How do you satisfy your man’s needs if he is ‘experienced’ and you are a virgin?

I’m into BDSM but my wife of 40 years is totally vanilla

Rhonda helps a kinky reader grapple with his vanilla relationship.

Once bitten, twice shy

Rhonda helps a 23-year-old virgin find a way to trust again.

Cuckold fantasies: My lover likes the idea of me with other men

‘My emotional brain says he doesn’t care enough to want me to himself. Are we doomed to remain fuck-buddies?’

Addicted to social media: in search of a meaningful connection

My life revolves around social media, I seek attention there all the time. I got on twitter to seek friends, a connection, but twitter relationships are temporary.

How do I tell my boyfriend I want an open relationship?

Rhonda helps a reader have a conversation about opening the relationship.