Perks Magazine

An exploration of sex, sexuality and little bits of life

The Perky Jouney

The Perky journey began back in 2010 with a little blog called Rhonda Perky’s Bits.

In my early 30s, married and divorced, from horny to frigid and back again, I began to delve into my experiences with friendship, love, lust, and everything in between.

My blog was a place to document my reflections and shifting perspectives on social norms such as monogamy and kink, and my experiences navigating the interpersonal.

A few years on, having enrolled to study sexology and sexual health, I expanded the blog to encompass feature articles, essays, and observations, and launched Perks Magazine.

I hope my journey inspires you to reflect and explore.

With love, Rhonda xx

Latest posts

My sex life

Rhonda reflects on the role sex plays in life (or doesn’t) and the struggles many women face (re)connecting with their sex life.

On consent: pushing past ‘no’ isn’t a victory

Rhonda explores the nuances of consent and what happens when we are socialised to defer to the needs of others or to push past no.

Why I chose not to have children

Rhonda explores the grief around her choice not to have children, from societal pressures, childhood trauma, and the state of the world today.

The pitfalls of making friends as a grownup

Rhonda faces some of the pitfalls of making friends as an adult and what can happen when one friend needs the company of the other more.

Stop Being a White Knight

Or, why you shouldn’t try to save the people you want to f*ck

Rope Sensei: your one-stop rope shop

Want to explore the pleasures of playing with rope? Rope Sensei has got your back.

Body image: when ‘perfection’ isn’t enough

Rhonda explores her toxic relationship with body image, attachment to self-criticism, and aversion to self-acceptance.

Filtering ourselves through rejection-coloured glasses

In Part Three of this exploration of self-image, projection, and the ego-defences, Rhonda explores how we filter our view of ourselves.

Memory — The Self as an Unreliable Narrator

In Part Two of this exploration of self-image, projection, and the ego-defences, Rhonda explores the unreliability of memory.

Projecting Rejection

The first in a series of posts where Rhonda explores self-image, projection, and the ego-defences we use to preserve our sense of self.

Under the covers…

Relation-ships
Kink
Single
Life
Sex
Your Stories
Sexuality
Perky Leigh
Porn
Ask Rhonda
Editorial
Perky’s Bits
Reviews

5 Reasons Listicles Should Be Abolished

You won’t believe what happens when you read this click-bait article!

When ‘no’ falls on deaf ears — sex offenders and the criminal justice system

Sexual violence and acts of sexual coercion are commonplace, yet many of these crimes go unreported, never make it to court, or get thrown out once they do. We take a closer look at why.

Baby Voodoo: When kink meets art meets fashion

Melbourne-based artist and designer Baby Voodoo shares her love of all things naughty and nice with Perks Magazine.

Mass shootings: disaffected young men or entitled objectification?

A response to Jim Dowd’s ‘The Shootings Are Not Senseless’.

If you don’t know, the answer is “no”

‘What if a girl says yes, then changes her mind?’ Rhonda provides some clarity on why the only yes is a sober and enthusiastic one.

The Creepy Line: Do Not Cross

Rhonda explores why it’s socially acceptable for women to flirt and compliment, but not straight men.

Passionfruit: A sex shop with a difference

Think if you’ve seen one sex shop you’ve seen them all? Look again. Michelle Temminghoff talks about what makes Passionfruit The Sensuality Shop in Melbourne, Australia, more than just an adult store.

Tennille Melcher: Art + Sensuality = Empowerment

Tennessee-based Boudoir/Intimate photographer and blogger Tennille Melcher shares her passion for empowering others.

My brush with HPV

One reader describes her brush with the Human Papillomavirus (HPV).

Tantra: get ready to try this at home

‘Why do to your man what he can do to himself?’ This week I ventured into the erotic world of Tantric massage.

The friendship destroyer

Rhonda learns a lesson in why some friendships are best left behind.

Projecting Rejection

The first in a series of posts where Rhonda explores self-image, projection, and the ego-defences we use to preserve our sense of self.

What does a word weigh?

‘Rape’? Rhonda Perky reflects on the weight of words in how we conceptualise our experiences.

On consent: pushing past ‘no’ isn’t a victory

Rhonda explores the nuances of consent and what happens when we are socialised to defer to the needs of others or to push past no.

The ‘Perfect’ Relationship

Rhonda reflects on what makes the ‘perfect’ relationship.

I am not okay

Who helps the helpers? Rhonda reflects on what it means to not be okay when you are the one who is supposed to keep it together.

Why I chose not to have children

Rhonda explores the grief around her choice not to have children, from societal pressures, childhood trauma, and the state of the world today.

Filtering ourselves through rejection-coloured glasses

In Part Three of this exploration of self-image, projection, and the ego-defences, Rhonda explores how we filter our view of ourselves.

The pitfalls of making friends as a grownup

Rhonda faces some of the pitfalls of making friends as an adult and what can happen when one friend needs the company of the other more.

‘Nobody buys flowers for the porn-pile girl’

Rhonda Perky goes under the covers to discover what it means to be a Modern Slut.

In conversation with sex coach Liv Bryant

Ever wondered what it’s like being a sex coach? I chat to sex coach Liv Bryant of Tell Me Darling to find out.

‘…to the exclusion of all others’

What monogamy really asks of our long-term partners and ourselves.

If you don’t know, the answer is “no”

‘What if a girl says yes, then changes her mind?’ Rhonda provides some clarity on why the only yes is a sober and enthusiastic one.

Choke Me, Spit On Me, I’m a Feminist — Part Two

Clarissa-Jan Lim shares the story of a self-proclaimed feminist BDSM couple Ian Locklear and Nicole Lavoie and the ways they reconcile their feminist views with their D/s lifestyle…

A square peg in a round hole

Rhonda struggles to define what ‘relationship’ might mean while still exploring her sexuality.

Perky Commandments

Rhonda’s commandments for love, lust and life.

AB/DL: Adult babies and diaper lovers

AB/DL (Adult Babies/Diaper Lovers) is an umbrella term for individuals who have an interest in various kinds of ‘Age Play’ or who are attracted to wearing diapers. Rhonda chats to members of the ABDL community to find out what it means for them.

The friendship destroyer

Rhonda learns a lesson in why some friendships are best left behind.

A Beginner’s Guide to Dating a Transgendered Person

What you need to know about dating a transgendered person.

Review: Sex with Shakespeare

We review Jillian Keenan’s memoir on Shakespeare, love, and spanking: a story not just for kinksters and fetishists, but for everyone.

My fiancé struggles to find partners in our open relationship

‘I don’t want to cheat but I can’t control myself. What should I do?’

More than friends: is it worth the risk?

Rhonda helps a Clueless Canadian decide whether it is worth risking friendship to pursue a short-term non-monogamous relationship.

I caught my boyfriend cheating

Rhonda helps a woman process the aftermath of a betrayal.

What is the difference between BDSM, D/s and S&M?

Rhonda answers the question: What is the difference between BDSM, D/s and S&M?

Turns out my guy has a girlfriend. He won’t tell her about me. Should I?

Rhonda Perky answers your question: The guy I’m seeing has a girlfriend and won’t tell her about me. Should I?

Condoms kill my erection

Rhonda helps a recently divorced man learn to use condoms without losing his erection.

I’m a virgin. Should I tell my kinky partner?

Should this virgin tell her S&M partner?

My partner has been with someone else, now I want my turn

‘How do I tell him I want to be with someone else?’

How can I get past my performance anxiety?

Rhonda answers your question on how to overcome performance anxiety during sex.

How can you tell whether somebody in an open relationship has feelings for you?

‘He acts like my boyfriend, but already has a girlfriend.’ Rhonda helps a confused reader navigate an open relationship.